Ocean Water

i will keep you warm when cold waters flood the present with the past

I won’t let you freeze from the glaciers of pain I used to cause

but you’ll have to feel for me with all the empathy you can find

abandoned homes under the sea where tsunamis used to strike

don’t let your heart remember, you’re above water now

I didn’t know you, I didn’t mean to sink your trust again

I didn’t know myself, I didn’t mean to sink so low

there’s no oasis in the middle of the sea

no way to make it up to you but spend every day

steering us to shore.

I waited at the water’s edge, dried by the sun

seeing your shape on the horizon I began to focus

my vision and now my eyes only swim with memories

of the future.

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Old Poems: Summer Baby

We walked all the way down to Venice

the sun set on our glass liquor heat

our infrared smiles, lost girl mouths

we sat, she smoked, he drove and

we were forever young

every light told me to stay

the paradise air tried to establish me

the city may pulverize my dreams.

I’m a Summer baby,

under a bed I sleep and hear their dreams

and hope mine isn’t a product of loneliness

Friday the 13th, Eve

 

I have no one–

I’m in the sun, a spotlight on my burned skin

the path is long, and paradice is n o w h e r e.

tonight under a honey moon

I will dream and feel God’s breath

(if He has enough oxygen to spare–

why don’t most people get enough

to breathe?)

this milky way city, unfair and glowing

spits me out like a meteor shower-

crazed and dark, a small night

walking down afternoon sidewalks.

 

too bad, hair long like kite strings

shirt like her last thread and eyes with night inside

looks desolate like she’d kill for a dollar

red-eyed like a beached cocaine whale

she must have sold herself

and turned herself off, shut her lights down

awhile ago. 

and there she goes, wandering off to Mexico…

 

dirty lip-using, tequila-hording, irresponsable

teenager, spanish-speaking, pacifist bitch

too loud, too awake, never sleeps,

yet in her slumber I hear my voice

loud like my pride like a kettle like

an american flag. like a girl who doesn’t deserve

anything but her own sins,

nothing to drink but her own blood,

nothing to say but ‘let’s go’

nothing to do but look into their eyes

she’s working the wrong shift

her heels are meant for the pavement

anyway;

there she goes, walking into the water

still pretending, still running.